Starting from where we are now, let’s bring some of our markers of success into the present moment. Which things or activities that we use to measure success can we have now or start doing now? The idea here is that we don’t want to hang our ‘perfect life’ on the outcome of our body changes. It takes time and effort to effect a significant change in our bodies. We can see partial results along the way that satisfy and encourage us. What we want to avoid is feeling like we haven’t ‘accomplished’ anything until, or unless, we get to the end.
Imagine you are relaxing in your favorite place in all the world. Wherever it is, this is the place you go to refresh and restore your soul, to feel completely alive inside. Think to yourself, “I am successful,” and think about what that means to you. What are you feeling or not feeling? What do you have, or not have? Who is with you and who is not? What are you doing or not doing? Are you wearing any particular type of clothing? Take a personal inventory of anything and everything that you see, sense and feel in this very of successful place.
We all have those friends, relatives, and co-workers who are the food pushers. They come to our house or to our desk and offer snacks, donuts, pot-luck food. Or they make remarks like, “You’re being soooo good,” as if that were something to be ashamed of. So how do we deal with these people? How do we stay grounded in awareness of our own truth without shutting someone down in a hurtful way?
Why do you join a weight management program and what do you expect to get from it? If you took a few minutes to write down your reasons for wanting to lose/gain/maintain weight I’m guessing some of the things on the list would include health, mobility, feeling good about ourselves, and improved appearance. I’d be willing to bet no one’s list would include anything like, “I just thought it would be fun to try dieting once in my life.”
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” ~Viktor E. Frankl
The whole point of increasing awareness of physical hunger and emotional hunger is so we can choose the best response to it and find the best way to satisfy it. If we aren’t aware of our triggers, our go-to response is a reaction. We always do what we’ve always done. If I always go to the kitchen to find food when I’m bored, that’s a reaction to that stimulus. I don’t have to think about it because I’ve pre-programmed a reaction. Boredom-kitchen-food. No thought involved whatsoever, and no awareness that I might choose something else.
When I walk into my annual family reunion, I am greeted with hellos and hugs. I feel welcome and loved. I feel comfortable being there, knowing I am accepted and knowing I will have a good experience. I feel content and eager to participate. This is emotional feedback.
When I go into my room, lie down on the bed, put a pillow under my knees and relax, my body settles into its easy place. My back lets me know it’s happy, my hip feels good, my shoulders relax, and very often I fall asleep just because I’m so comfortable. This is body feedback. It’s my body letting me know I’ve done exactly the thing it wants and needs to feel really, really good.
Right now, I’m going to recommend we separate ourselves from our bodies. The things we identify with, and the names we give ourselves are very powerful. So, when I have a thought like, “I am fat,” I’m taking on the identity of “fat” to the core of my being. By accepting that label and putting in an “I am” statement, I’m making a judgment about my entire self.
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